Submission – Musings of a Chaotic Mind

September 10, 2021September 10, 2021

Manage Your Expectations

This article has been on my mind for a while now, but I’ve had trouble getting the words right. Usually if I wait long enough things will more-or-less form up in my head and then I can spill them out in one long whoosh.

That didn’t seem to be happening with this one and then I realized it was because I was working with the wrong title.

I started out with: Subs Are Not Children. And that’s true. Even if the sub identifies as a Little or a Brat, they aren’t children. The distinction between a childish headspace and a child is hugely important for many reasons.

But that’s not really what I want to discuss right now, so I gave it a title that more accurately reflects what I was trying to say: Manage your expectations. That is nice and compact, but it’s also a bit vague.

August 13, 2021August 4, 2021

What Do I Do If My Needs Aren’t Being Met?

My last serious blog post discussed relationship maintenance, especially where it applies to D/s partners. The importance of occasionally going through your rules and protocols to discuss what’s working and what isn’t, cannot be underestimated.

May 28, 2021May 28, 2021

Punishing a Submissive Part One: What’s the Point of Punishing an Adult Anyway?

There’s a lot of misunderstandings about punishment. Lots of people are confused about why we do it and what is the purpose of it is.

April 16, 2021April 5, 2021

Can you be a feminist and a submissive?

I usually try to be more inclusive with pronouns, but this topic seems very specific to submissive women who submit to men so I’m going to focus on M/F, but there are many parts of this that are going to apply to the role regardless of gender so bear that in mind.

It’s no secret that some feminists have conflicts with submissive women. The concept that feminism gives us the right to CHOOSE to submit is often lost in the translation. Not only do you have the right to submit, but you have the right to be a housewife, and a stay-at-home mother, and still be feminist. The whole point of feminism is that no one is telling us who we have to be.

January 22, 2021January 6, 2021

Daily Lists and How They Help With D/s (Especially Long Distance)

So if you’ve been reading my blog for a while you know I have two Doms, L&G and that we’re all three in different countries so the chances to be together in person, especially all three of us, are very rare. That means a good part of our relationship has to be conducted long distance.

This isn’t a new experience for me. I’ve had many Doms from a distance over the years. Some were close enough to visit frequently, while others had to happen only rarely. It can be hard at times but the Internet is a fantastic tool for allowing this to happen.