Spanko Memories – Musings of a Chaotic Mind

August 23, 2024August 20, 2024

KINKY MEMORIES: THE REN FAIRE

For those of you who are kinky and have gone to Ren Faires, you know that they are excellent places to let your kinky side show a tiny bit. Obviously, we’re not talking full-fledged exposure or anything, but when it comes to your clothing choices… well, leather is encouraged.

Collars, cuffs, and even the occasional flogger hanging from your belt are not out of place there. And as if to encourage the kinky crowd, you’ll find that many Ren Faires have stocks set up, not just for display, but to be used. Most people get in them for fun photos. “Oh, Look. I’m in the stocks for being bad! Hahaha”

The Naked Autograph Story

I don’t have anything serious ready for this week, so I thought I’d just tell you a funny story. Someone brought this up the other day and said I should put it on the blog. Since I don’t believe I’ve ever told the story here, I figured I might as well.

I tend to only talk about my own experiences as a way to give examples of situations, since this blog isn’t really about my personal life. It’s more about helping people learn about the D/s lifestyle and BDSM– and occasionally reminding people that I make my living from my books.

But I do have some fun stories from my time in the kink world and this is one that always makes me laugh when I think about it.

Growing Up Kinky: Finally Finding Some Non-Fiction Information on BDSM.

Fiction is pretty much always the gateway to kink when kids are growing up, I think. I mean no kids are out there stumbling across instruction manuals for BDSM. They see the cartoons with everyone getting spanked, the old sitcoms with wives getting punished.

Then you have the more modern shows where both men and woman get spanked, but usually now in sexy situations instead of discipline. Maybe they see some spankings in old kid’s books, or read stories about it happening—and that’s how they find out that there is something weirdly compelling about all of it.

It’s weird being kinky as a kid because you can literally hate being punished—and avoid it at all costs, but then… seeing someone else get punished is just completely enthralling and you don’t know why.

April 14, 2023May 1, 2023

Growing Up Kinky: Fiction That Shaped Me

These days if you want to read about non-fiction kink or learn about BDSM there are a million websites to look at. There are tons of real resources and blogs from people who know what they’re talking about.

And if websites aren’t enough and you want books, every kind of kink can easily be found by searching on Amazon. For those who prefer to hold a book in their hands before they buy it, most chain bookstores, like B&N, have plenty on the shelves you can flip through.

In other words the information is all over the place.

But it didn’t used to be like that. When I was in high school, Amazon didn’t exist yet, and the local bookstores, even the chains, had very little on kink. You might find half a shelf in the sexuality section if you were lucky.

November 11, 2022October 26, 2022

The Best (and Safest) Spanking Toys for a Newbie

I was going through my spanking implement bin this week and I was thinking about how many of those toys I’ve had since way back in the beginning. Many of them were handmade, or normal house items we appropriated, and I kept them because of fond memories.

I still also have the first real implements I bought or were gifted to me. With care, many of these things will last a lifetime—though we’ve broken our share of paddles and had leather fall apart at times.

We have a lot of toys because we like a variety of sensation. Each toy gives you a completely different result, so when picking one you really need to think about what effect you want. If you’re new you might not know what you like yet, and that’s okay. You have plenty of time to explore and learn.