long distance – Musings of a Chaotic Mind

June 10, 2022June 3, 2022

Aftercare in a Long-Distance Relationship

How do you do aftercare in a long-distance relationship?

This is a question that comes up now and then. More people than usual have found themselves in long-distance relationships over the past couple years. Maybe they never expected to be, but Covid forced the issue, so LD relationships have been a big topic.

I was asked about it again recently and I realized I hadn’t done a stand-alone blog post on the subject. I think there was some discussion on aftercare in the main Long-Distance D/s series I did, but it’s probably worth doing on its own.

So, how do you do aftercare when your partner is far away, and you can’t really touch them? Short answer: the same way you do everything else from a distance—with adaptations. The long answer is a little more complicated so let’s dive into it.

July 9, 2021July 3, 2021

So… Isn’t It Time for You to Do Some Relationship Maintenance?

It came on me out of the blue that it was time for this in my own life, so I’m passing it on to you. This serves as a reminder that if you want your relationships to last they should be fluid and able to change as you and your partners do.

That means your rules and relationship expectations need to be discussed too. Depending on how in flux your lives are that can mean having these discussions fairly often, but even if everything is stable and you’re content it’s still a good idea to pull things apart now and then. So….

April 9, 2021April 5, 2021

Long Distance Daddy (Book rec.)

Way back in 2019 (about thirty years ago by Covid time) I posted an article about the Dirty Daddies anthology of that year. If you missed it you can find it here: Long Distance D/s and the Dirty Daddies Anthology

It had particular interest to me because there was a novella in it about a long distance relationship. Since that’s a special focus of mine I was very excited to see it. There have been very few books out there that focus on long distance relationships. It’s really nice to see some well-written representation. Unfortunately Dirty Daddies is always a limited time collection, which means after a couple of months the story was gone.

But I have some exciting news for you!

January 22, 2021January 6, 2021

Daily Lists and How They Help With D/s (Especially Long Distance)

So if you’ve been reading my blog for a while you know I have two Doms, L&G and that we’re all three in different countries so the chances to be together in person, especially all three of us, are very rare. That means a good part of our relationship has to be conducted long distance.

This isn’t a new experience for me. I’ve had many Doms from a distance over the years. Some were close enough to visit frequently, while others had to happen only rarely. It can be hard at times but the Internet is a fantastic tool for allowing this to happen.

January 8, 2021December 10, 2020

Covid Silence and How It’s Affecting Relationships

A more serious topic for us today after the relaxed December month. Covid Silence is a term I made up to describe the way everyone is kind of pulling into themselves right now. Between the depression, the wish to avoid mentions of the pandemic, and just in general not having much to chat about means a lot of people are going quiet.

For me the hardest part of living in a pandemic has been that silence and difficulty in communicating. It’s amazing how much the daily chatter dies down when no one leaves their house, or does anything fun to share.