Dealing With Punishment Issues–Part two of ‘Letting Punishments Go Can Be Unhelpful’

Letting punishments go can be bad for your D/s relationship, but sometimes you might need to work around issues that pop up. You might want to read part one first : Letting Punishments Go Can be Unhelpful 

So what if the Dom is trying to let something slide but the submissive keeps doing it? Or they come right out and say they feel bad about something they’ve done, but the Dom doesn’t want to punish for it? I often hear subs complaining about Doms not being consistent with the punishments. Making threats but not following through.

Continue reading “Dealing With Punishment Issues–Part two of ‘Letting Punishments Go Can Be Unhelpful’”

How to make a nearly silent kinky toy for a couple bucks! DYI-Kink!

Some of you may know what a Loopy Johnny is because it’s rather famous in the kink community. It’s a brilliant implement, both severe and almost silent which means those of you who have to be wary of making too much noise will love this. It also leaves some really beautiful loop shaped marks. I totally advocate picking up the real thing if you’ve got the bucks. They are beautiful, durable, very easy to stick in your pocket to carry anywhere and I’ve had mine for years without any problems. Continue reading “How to make a nearly silent kinky toy for a couple bucks! DYI-Kink!”

If your Doms don’t make you mad sometimes there might be a problem.

I try really hard to be inclusive of everyone and every possible relationship setup when I write these blog posts. So, I don’t make a lot of definitive statements like, “If you do this you are wrong!” Every submissive is unique, every Dominant is unique, so of course each relationship is going to be different. But in my experience if you don’t get mad at your Dominant now and then there is usually a problem because with real submission there needs to be both challenge and growth and neither of those come without frustration. Continue reading “If your Doms don’t make you mad sometimes there might be a problem.”

Structure and No Leniency

The thing about being a submissive is that your needs tend to be fluid. Your Dominant has to be able to follow the changes with you. Rules, if you have them, need to grow with your needs. Sometimes one becomes superfluous, maybe you’ve outgrown the need for it; other times it becomes clear that there is a lack that needs to be corrected. People change constantly so it’s really important that the people involved in the relationship occasionally discuss and consider these rules to make sure that they still fit the person you are now. Continue reading “Structure and No Leniency”