The Scene – Page 2 – Musings of a Chaotic Mind

January 26, 2024January 7, 2024

The Definition of Kink Needs an Update

Black and grey background with the words: Learning Safely.

A kink is often described as a sexual activity that falls outside the norm. That is an inadequate definition, in my opinion, and needs to be modernized and updated.

Any BDSM educator will tell you that not everything we do in BDSM or in the ‘scene’ is sexual in nature, or a sexual turn on to both parties participating.

But there is no other way to really describe wanting/needing certain activities even when it doesn’t turn you on. There’s no other word to describe a love of bondage, spanking, etc other than calling it a kink… even though your need may not be sexual in nature.

Bruising And Marks

We recently talked about Impact Play here. I had actually intended to post this article first, but I realized it made more sense to wait until after I posted the one on Impact Play, since one of the things a lot of people love about that kind of BDSM are the marks it leaves behind.

This article will be a bit longer, because I want to discuss why so many people love to wear the marks of their play, but also talk about ways to avoid marks that last longer, like bruising.

Why do so many submissives love to wear marks?

If you are a sub or bottom of whatever type, who enjoys spanking, then chances are you know what I’m talking about right now. There is nothing quite like looking at the aftermath of a good spanking or paddling, and seeing all the red marks and maybe even some bruises that are left behind.

July 7, 2023June 29, 2023

What Is Consensual Non-Consent (CNC)?

The phrase, Consensual Non-Consent, is a bit of a misnomer. It implies a sex or kink act where non-consensual things happen, which isn’t the case. Informed consent is always involved with CNC.

However, the activities may look non-consensual even though they aren’t, because consent has already been established at another time.

March 24, 2023March 19, 2023

My Favorite Sensation Toy– The Wartenberg Wheel

I recently wrote about an implement I hate: the cane. The article was deeper than that and discussed something more important than my preferences, which is that it’s fine to avoid certain toys if they upset you. It doesn’t matter how iconic a part of the scene they are.

But it did inspire me to think about other toys and I thought I would write about one I love today. The Wartenberg wheel, also called a pinwheel. It’s actually a medical device used to test nerve reactions and sensitivity.