Relationships – Page 5 – Musings of a Chaotic Mind

September 15, 2023September 15, 2023

Let’s Talk About Service Subs

People are often confused about the various types of submissives in the scene. Some aren’t aware that there is more than one way to be a sub. Others know there are multiple ways, but aren’t really sure what the difference is. And some… well, they like to gatekeep and say that submission only counts if you do it in the way they expect.

But the truth is… there are many different roles that fall under the header of submissive.

What Is Consensual Non-Consent (CNC)?

The phrase, Consensual Non-Consent, is a bit of a misnomer. It implies a sex or kink act where non-consensual things happen, which isn’t the case. Informed consent is always involved with CNC.

However, the activities may look non-consensual even though they aren’t, because consent has already been established at another time.

May 19, 2023May 3, 2023

Ethical Bratting 101

Ethical bratting is one of those phrases I’ve been using for so long, that I’m not sure if I made it up or just heard it somewhere. When I was new to the scene, I was a brat, like many new submissives.

And don’t get me wrong, I can still be bratty with certain people. We all have bratty moments, I think. But I no longer identify as a brat and haven’t for a very long time.

It’s the easiest transition to submitting because in a lot of ways it replicates what we experience in childhood. Someone in authority gives us rules. We break them. We get punished — rinse and repeat.

Topping From The Bottom – Part Two

So last week we discussed topping from the bottom. I described what it was, and why it’s often not such horrible thing. But what we didn’t discuss is how to tell the difference between communication and topping from the bottom.

As I’ve said, sometimes Doms confuse asking for things with topping from the bottom. Those are two very different things. There is nothing wrong with asking for what you want. Communication is the sign of a healthy relationship.

So…

April 28, 2023May 1, 2023

Topping From The Bottom – Part One

Let’s talk about topping from the bottom. If you search the topic online, you’ll pull up tons of articles saying why it’s B-A-D.

This accusation has been leveled at subs, of all types, for decades, but what does it actually mean? Are you doing it without being aware? Is it really a huge problem?

This is a big topic with a lot of facets to discuss so I’ll be breaking it up into two sections.

What is Topping from the bottom?