Submissive Life – Page 4 – Musings of a Chaotic Mind

November 3, 2023November 3, 2023

Bruising And Marks

We recently talked about Impact Play here. I had actually intended to post this article first, but I realized it made more sense to wait until after I posted the one on Impact Play, since one of the things a lot of people love about that kind of BDSM are the marks it leaves behind.

This article will be a bit longer, because I want to discuss why so many people love to wear the marks of their play, but also talk about ways to avoid marks that last longer, like bruising.

Why do so many submissives love to wear marks?

If you are a sub or bottom of whatever type, who enjoys spanking, then chances are you know what I’m talking about right now. There is nothing quite like looking at the aftermath of a good spanking or paddling, and seeing all the red marks and maybe even some bruises that are left behind.

September 15, 2023September 15, 2023

Let’s Talk About Service Subs

People are often confused about the various types of submissives in the scene. Some aren’t aware that there is more than one way to be a sub. Others know there are multiple ways, but aren’t really sure what the difference is. And some… well, they like to gatekeep and say that submission only counts if you do it in the way they expect.

But the truth is… there are many different roles that fall under the header of submissive.

What Is Consensual Non-Consent (CNC)?

The phrase, Consensual Non-Consent, is a bit of a misnomer. It implies a sex or kink act where non-consensual things happen, which isn’t the case. Informed consent is always involved with CNC.

However, the activities may look non-consensual even though they aren’t, because consent has already been established at another time.

June 16, 2023June 12, 2023

Growing Up Kinky: Finally Finding Some Non-Fiction Information on BDSM.

Fiction is pretty much always the gateway to kink when kids are growing up, I think. I mean no kids are out there stumbling across instruction manuals for BDSM. They see the cartoons with everyone getting spanked, the old sitcoms with wives getting punished.

Then you have the more modern shows where both men and woman get spanked, but usually now in sexy situations instead of discipline. Maybe they see some spankings in old kid’s books, or read stories about it happening—and that’s how they find out that there is something weirdly compelling about all of it.

It’s weird being kinky as a kid because you can literally hate being punished—and avoid it at all costs, but then… seeing someone else get punished is just completely enthralling and you don’t know why.

May 19, 2023May 3, 2023

Ethical Bratting 101

Ethical bratting is one of those phrases I’ve been using for so long, that I’m not sure if I made it up or just heard it somewhere. When I was new to the scene, I was a brat, like many new submissives.

And don’t get me wrong, I can still be bratty with certain people. We all have bratty moments, I think. But I no longer identify as a brat and haven’t for a very long time.

It’s the easiest transition to submitting because in a lot of ways it replicates what we experience in childhood. Someone in authority gives us rules. We break them. We get punished — rinse and repeat.