Submissive Life – Page 9 – Musings of a Chaotic Mind

October 29, 2021October 21, 2021

Can You Have A Dom Outside of a Vanilla Relationship? Part 1

Even though we’re going to be discussing Doms for the most part, there is really more to this question. Basically, what it’s asking is: If I need something I can’t get in my marriage, is it okay to find it elsewhere.

This stemmed from an email I received last week with the question in the title, but as I started thinking about it, I realized that is a small part of a much bigger conversation. And there’s a lot there that I’m not going to get into because it’s out of my focus.

September 10, 2021September 10, 2021

Manage Your Expectations

This article has been on my mind for a while now, but I’ve had trouble getting the words right. Usually if I wait long enough things will more-or-less form up in my head and then I can spill them out in one long whoosh.

That didn’t seem to be happening with this one and then I realized it was because I was working with the wrong title.

I started out with: Subs Are Not Children. And that’s true. Even if the sub identifies as a Little or a Brat, they aren’t children. The distinction between a childish headspace and a child is hugely important for many reasons.

But that’s not really what I want to discuss right now, so I gave it a title that more accurately reflects what I was trying to say: Manage your expectations. That is nice and compact, but it’s also a bit vague.

August 13, 2021August 4, 2021

What Do I Do If My Needs Aren’t Being Met?

My last serious blog post discussed relationship maintenance, especially where it applies to D/s partners. The importance of occasionally going through your rules and protocols to discuss what’s working and what isn’t, cannot be underestimated.

June 25, 2021June 5, 2021

Brats! Are They Subs or What?

This is going to be a super quick one. Just kidding. You know it won’t be. It seems like a simple question on the surface, right? “Are brats subs?”

June 4, 2021June 5, 2021

Punishing a Submissive Part Two: Sometimes it’s Not About Teaching A Lesson

In the first part we did a basic overview of why some subs/bottoms/littles want or need punishment, and basically what the point of it is. I think that covered the common things people tend to talk about. Probably nothing too earth-shattering in that, but we laid the groundwork to discuss some things that are a little deeper.