bdsm – Page 6 – Musings of a Chaotic Mind

August 25, 2023August 27, 2023

Finding Time To Be Little

I saw a comment from someone in a group recently about really needing some Little time, but just not having the time or space for it. As I was replying to them, I realized it was probably an issue many people have. So here we are with a whole article about it.

How do you balance that need for some completely relaxed, stress-free, inner child time… with the overwhelming demands of adult life?

And…

When do you stop and take a moment to enjoy that Little headspace, when it seems like you have a never ending list of responsibilities to take care of?

In my experience, if you find yourself really needing Little time and you don’t take it, keep pushing your Little side down because it’s not convenient, eventually your Little will break out—and probably at the worst possible time.

July 7, 2023June 29, 2023

What Is Consensual Non-Consent (CNC)?

The phrase, Consensual Non-Consent, is a bit of a misnomer. It implies a sex or kink act where non-consensual things happen, which isn’t the case. Informed consent is always involved with CNC.

However, the activities may look non-consensual even though they aren’t, because consent has already been established at another time.

May 19, 2023May 3, 2023

Ethical Bratting 101

Ethical bratting is one of those phrases I’ve been using for so long, that I’m not sure if I made it up or just heard it somewhere. When I was new to the scene, I was a brat, like many new submissives.

And don’t get me wrong, I can still be bratty with certain people. We all have bratty moments, I think. But I no longer identify as a brat and haven’t for a very long time.

It’s the easiest transition to submitting because in a lot of ways it replicates what we experience in childhood. Someone in authority gives us rules. We break them. We get punished — rinse and repeat.

Topping From The Bottom – Part Two

So last week we discussed topping from the bottom. I described what it was, and why it’s often not such horrible thing. But what we didn’t discuss is how to tell the difference between communication and topping from the bottom.

As I’ve said, sometimes Doms confuse asking for things with topping from the bottom. Those are two very different things. There is nothing wrong with asking for what you want. Communication is the sign of a healthy relationship.

So…

April 28, 2023May 1, 2023

Topping From The Bottom – Part One

Let’s talk about topping from the bottom. If you search the topic online, you’ll pull up tons of articles saying why it’s B-A-D.

This accusation has been leveled at subs, of all types, for decades, but what does it actually mean? Are you doing it without being aware? Is it really a huge problem?

This is a big topic with a lot of facets to discuss so I’ll be breaking it up into two sections.

What is Topping from the bottom?